Britney Spears has an upcoming memoir, "The Woman in Me", which becomes so controversial even before its release on October 24. Not because the book contains intimate details about her colorful life but because she has a bombshell revelation that shocked all of us.
Britney, one of the greatest music pop icons of our generation, revealed that she had an abortion while still dating fellow pop icon, Justin Timberlake.
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| Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake during happier days |
This revelation caught us by surprise (especially those who witnessed Britney at the peak of her career during the late 1990s and early 2000s) because this was kept for more than 20 years. We knew the fact that she and Justin were an item before but we did not expect she went through a very painful experience of getting an abortion.
Here’s how Britney described her pregnancy in her memoir. “It was a surprise, but for me, it wasn’t a tragedy. I loved Justin so much. I always expected us to have a family together one day. This would just be much earlier than I’d anticipated. But Justin definitely wasn’t happy about the pregnancy. He said we weren’t ready to have a baby in our lives, that we were way too young.”
She was compelled to “agree not to have the baby” but seemed to have some regrets about the decision they made. “I don’t know if that was the right decision. If it had been left up to me alone, I never would have done it,” she revealed. “And yet Justin was so sure that he didn’t want to be a father.”
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| Cover of Britney's memoir |
Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears dated between 1998 to 2002. They were the hottest celebrity young couples back then because they were at the height of their popularity. Justin as a member of the ultra-popular boy band, N'Sync, and Britney as a solo artist.
Justin and Britney met in 1992 when they joined The All-New Mickey Mouse Club. She shared a dressing room with Christina Aguilera and looked up to the older cast members like Keri Russell, Ryan Gosling, and Ryan Lucca.
After Britney's shocking confession in her memoir, fans recalled her highly emotional ballad, which she wrote, "Every Time". Released in 2003, a year after her relationship with Justin Timberlake had ended.
This song was unusual for Britney Spears' style because at that time she was known for highly energetic pop songs such as "Baby One More Time" and "Oops! I Did It Again".
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| Screenshot from Everytime music video |
The lyrics of the songs were filled with sad emotions, longing for someone who seemed far away from her. So everyone thought the song was meant for Justin.
The music video for this song was intriguing. It showed Britney having a terrible row with her partner and then she drowned herself in the bathtub and had a vision of running to the hospital and seeing a woman who just gave birth.
With her abortion revelation, fans are now speculating that perhaps Britney wrote the lyrics of "Everytime" for her baby as her way of saying sorry.
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| Screenshot from Britney's Everytime MV |
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| Britney Spears' Everytime music video |
Part of the lyrics of the song, Britney seemed to lament the "separation", feeling sorry for the loss, and asking for forgiveness. "I may have made it rain. Please, forgive me. My weakness caused you pain. And this song's my sorry".
So is it really meant for the baby she could have been?
I was in my teens during the peak of Britney's career and grew up listening to all her songs and all the hit songs from the boy bands of that era - West Life, Back Street Boys, N'Sync, A1, and Boyzone.
In my personal opinion, analyzing the lyrics of Everytime which Britney personally wrote, this song was half meant for Justin Timberlake and not entirely for their "lost" baby.
If you analyze the lyrics, they describe the heartfelt emotion of missing someone, hurt, longing, and a little regret for the lost love.
It was rumored before that there was cheating involved in the breakup of Justin and Britney as the latter became close with a vocalist with another boy band although Britney insisted it was just a misunderstanding Justin thoroughly ended the relationship, so this song was Britney's message of sorry to Justin. But it was really Justin the real love of her life, and that's why she felt so "broken" when the relationship ended.
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| Britney and Justin during happier days |
Perhaps, there's a part of the lyrics that is also meant for their "lost" baby and her regret of getting an abortion, the song is still entirely meant for Justin. It just happened that the music video of this song included a scene where someone gave birth. Perhaps, Britney was insinuating that if she died one day, she could finally meet their "unborn" child.
So many speculations and interpretations are emerging now about this song but one thing is for sure, Britney wrote the lyrics to describe her sadness for someone she used to love who is no longer at her side and she's expressing her longing, her regrets, her hurt, her despair of losing the love of her life.
It remains one of the saddest songs ever written by an artist. Even the melody is filled with regrets, hurt, and despair. I love singing this song.
Everytime lyrics:
Notice me. Take my hand.Why carry on without me?
Every time I try to fly, I fall
Without my wings, I feel so small
And every time I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you, baby
I make believe. That you are here
It's the only way. I see clear
What have I done? You seem to move uneasy
And every time I try to fly, I fall
Without my wings, I feel so small
I guess I need you, baby
And every time I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you, baby
I may have made it rain. Please, forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song's my sorry
At night, I pray. That soon your face will fade away
And every time I try to fly, I fall
Without my wings, I feel so small
I guess I need you, baby
And every time I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you, baby...
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